Sunday, November 27, 2011

Kate Hearts Justin Beaver! PWN3D!

{ Kate Prouty Hearts Justin Beaver }  
Kate, your reign as the chief persecutor of tea lovers is over. Bwa-ha-ha!

"I love flower tea," Kate gushes embarrassingly.

Friday, November 25, 2011

Thanksgiving, In Verse

'tWAS the night before THankgiving
and all through the house,
not a grownup was stirring
but the dogs ate a mouse.

The taters were skinned and in water with care,
and the 'shrooms were quartered and waiting for ...

This isn't working very well.
How about this?

"Thanksgiving blahblahturkeyblah potatoesblahblahwine."


Happy whatevergiving.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Kate's Croissant-Making Cocktail Hour! [Link]

Remember how I'm going to do all that "clean eating"? 
Tomorrow.  I start tomorrow. Promise.

But today?  Today I shall eat croissants.  That I made MYSELF.

Oh yes indeedlydoodly
Croissants make you cool.

Monday, November 14, 2011

In Which I Confess That I'm Not Really A Gwyneth

What is a "Gwyneth," you ask?
It's a Perfect Person.  Tall, thin, eco-conscious, kind, crafty, arty, smart, beautiful, raises her children Just So.

I was on the phone with Steeeve today, and said, "Let me just TELL you what was on my menu this last weekend!"

He apparently braced himself for me to say, "At the local farmers' market, I found the most EXquisite tomato, and with the basil from my own garden, the homemade ricotta my CHILDREN made, we lovingly crafted this salad with fresh-ground multi-colored pepper, imported balsamic vinegar, and just a TEENY touch of truffle oil."

I admit that I like to tell of my culinary successes.  I'll post pictures of the fresh mozzarella dangling in its cheesecloth,over my sink.  Or the homemade garlic scape pesto cream sauce.  Or the fresh strawberry/rhubarb-stuffed french toast.

Well, none of that this time.

TWO nights running of frozen boxed pizza.  One lunch of canned Campbell's soup.  Toaster Strudels for breakfast one day, and those frozen Jimmy Dean sausage/egg/cheese croissants the next.  Frozen fish stick/mac and cheese dinners for lunch on Sunday. 


Surrender.  I did it.

Panda Poop Tea

Fellow tea drinkers, I can now announce to you that we have won the arms race with the introduction of Panda Poop tea. Please read all about it at The 39 Steeps. In your face, coffee swillers.

{ There's gold in them thar panda poops }

Sunday, November 13, 2011


You know that word that's so overused, "ridonkulous"? 

If you apply the same idea (replacing the "ick" sound with "onk") to other words, you can get some funny results.

Wonked Witch of the West


Chonk Flonk.

Tonket to Ride

Tonkle Me Elmo

Pronk your finger on the spindle of the spinning wheel and die.

Flonk your Bonk

Matronkulate into college

Lonkety Split

 I want spronkles!

Monday, November 7, 2011

I Has Teh Crayzee

My house is making me nuts.  I'm kind of concerned that it really, truly is. 
Weigh in.  Should I run to a mental hospital, or can I wait?

My House Screams At Me

Friday, November 4, 2011

Stupid Meme, Applied to Real People

You know about the stupidly short marriage of some Kim person?

I just found a "Kardashian Calculator," and discovered that my parents have been married for
289.53 Kardashians
 And my mom only had ONE wedding dress.  

[Steven here: The KD is not only a unit of measurement for time, but also of public interest in a topic entirely uninteresting.]
[Kate here:  Duh. It's not "KD." It's "KIU."  "Kardashian International Units."